Gremlin Grill

There are plenty of savory dishes with cocoa in them. I love a rich Mexican mole sauce, but I’m not thinking spicy. Ditto Cincinnati chili. It’s good stuff, and I once made a dry rub based on a Cinci chili recipe that I used on steaks. It was good, but so were the beers and damned if I know what I put in it. And it doesn’t matter, because I’m thinking sweeter. Much sweeter.

In Ukraine, they eat salo. Pork fat. Pure, unadulterated, un-fried-in-grandma’s-cast-iron-skillet pork fat. Yes, they often eat their salo raw. That’s why they’re tougher than we are. You thought it was the Chernobyl glow. Nope. It’s pork fat. From what I’ve read, sometimes you can get your salo covered in chocolate. That’s more in line with what I'm hungry for: Sweet chocolatey greasy pork.

Wait. I found it. This is kind of like what I’m thinking: Chocolate Pork Rinds
Salty and smoky and mmmm…choco-riffic!

I insist on pointing out that my pending experiment with pork and chocolate has nothing to do with the Atkins diet. I have no problem with carbs. Carbs aren’t evil. You can’t honestly think that eating all that meat is good for you, can you? People, it’s the Gout Diet. It’s the Coronary Diet. It’s the Billy Squier diet (Stroke! Stroke!) Want to lose weight? Stop eating like an idiot and exercise. From the bottom of my beer belly, I’m sick of these damn diets. You know what you should eat and what you shouldn’t eat. Don’t be stupid.

I should eat more chocolate pork. I’m going to fiddle with it at the American Royal Barbecue this weekend. I have a hunch that a little Hershey’s syrup on a baby back rib might be a winner. If you’re lucky enough to be in the neighborhood, you can try some. In fact, you go first.