Moe. Lasses.
I’m at work, and there’s a 25-pound block of molasses on my desk. I’m the luckiest boy in all the land. Or I would be if I had any idea what to do with it.
Actually, I know what to do with it: Deworm cows. Who has some cows I can borrow? The molasses is actually Safe-Guard® (fenbendazole) , a cattle dewormer from Intervet®. I write some of their ads. And I’m fascinated by this big ass hunk of molasses.
It kind of stinks. It smells farm sweet, but not grandma’s baking in the kitchen farm sweet – it’s more of a barn sweet. Now, I kind of like the smell of a farm. Bails of hay, manure, dirt and diesel make a potpourri that beats all the candles and flowery crap. In fact, as scents go, it’s second only to bacon. Unless we’re talking high volume hog confinement on a July afternoon. Which we’re not, so there ya go – farms smell good.
I lost my train of thought.
Anyway, I was making dry rub last night for the ribs and butts I’m smoking tomorrow, and I ran out of brown sugar. I wonder of a nice chunk of this molasses could substitute? I could just grate a cup or so off. We’d all be dewormed. Can’t go wrong. I wonder how salty it is, though? I’m told cattle naturally moderate their salt intake, but I’m not sure if that means the block of molasses dewormer is salty or not? A cow knows when to stop eating it, though. Which just impresses the hell out of me, because drop a bag of salty chips in front of me, and I sure don’t know when to stop eating them. Maybe if they had dewormer in them, it’d be different.
I’m sorry, what were we talking about?